Some days are so productive and lively whereas some bite like a mosquito and leave horrible traces for the entire life. Some days feel worthy and some are just turmoil of endless suffering. For me, the worst ones are when I feel lonely. I love staying alone, I do, infact I feel myself when I'm alone, but being lonely sucks, literally, it sucks the life out of my soul. I love being with myself as most people of my generation do. We love ourselves and place no one over us, but a phase where we feel detached from ourselves isn't something we want but who cares what we want, we still feel it and it takes us deep into oblivion.
Adding to that, loneliness isn't of just one kind, it has plenty of faces. At times, it is a new situation of loneliness, this happens when we move to a new place or start a new job/school. We have I am different loneliness, this happens when one finds trouble fitting in. Animal loneliness, I have this a lot whenever Sophie leaves my side. I feel kinda incomplete without her. Sweetheart loneliness is the one that every person of this generation endures through. It intensifies after a tragic breakup, trust me on this one,lol. At times, friends can be a reason for your loneliness. A betrayal from a friend can definitely shake grounds and evaporate your trust from all sorts of friendships and bondings. That feeling of having no one to talk to is sad and unspeakable. But, the real villain is still out there, the no time for me loneliness, a stage where you forget who you are and what makes you happy. It is quite common these days as we run after everything other than our mental health.
Now dealing with loneliness is tough, I mean real arduous, but getting over it is possible. At the end of a dark tunnel is a spoke of light. Loneliness is a normal, human experience. But when left unchecked, it can be bad for your emotional and physical health. Some studies have found that loneliness is just as bad for your health as smoking 15 cigarettes per day.
I am no expert in dealing with emotions and feelings but my study of human development and recent emprise made me form this short tiny list.
1. ACKNOWLEDGING LONELINESS
Feeling lonely won't make you weak, it just represents that you are a human with emotions. I have had this trouble for a long. I suppress my feelings and try to assure myself as everything is alright, I hope you d not develop the same mindset. Acknowledging is the first step towards getting past this feeling.
2. DITCHING INSTAGRAM
Taking short breaks from social media has proved to have more positive aspects than negative ones. Social media breeds loneliness by giving false perceptions. All they show there are their best selves and happy moments, the darkest side of their life is kept in a small dark room in the corner of their heart. Looking at their life gives nothing other than a depressing feeling of secludedness.
3. CONNECTING WTH PEOPLE FROM PAST
No, not your toxic ex. Perhaps a school friend who has lost touch since graduation or your college roommate who used to be your shoulder to cry on.
Talking about stuff and knowing about what they are doing might help you get over that feeling of withdrawal and make you feel connected again.
4. LEARNING A NEW HOBBY
Nothing beats the feeling of learning something new. The sudden thrust in confidence in unspeakable. It might also unlock doors to meeting new people. Experiment with different activities, from fishing to pottery, until you discover things that you love.
Doing something nice for other people can help you feel better. It may also help you feel more connected to the community.
Whether you get involved in an official community fundraiser or you decide to do a kind deed for a neighbor, there are many things you do to perform acts of kindness. If you’re struggling to find something you can do, you might contact local charities, hospitals, nursing homes, or animal shelters to see how you could volunteer or offer assistance.
6. WRITE DOWN THE THINGS YOU ARE GRATEFUL FOR
Feeling lonely is like burying yourself in the grave of your thoughts. They say, "gratitude turns what we have into enough."Writing such optimistic thoughts might pull you out of your headspace. And this is how positivity will flow.
Not a lost list of do's and don'ts but a few things that saved me from drowning in the ocean of detachment. The key is to slow down for a bit and focus on something you really love or something you've always wanted to do but never did because sticking to the mundane won't help much.
Take care have a good day
And remember that I am always here for you.
xoxo
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